“There is nothing more humiliating than having to ask your 10-year-old for help with your phone”.
– Cynthia Crossley, Habyts
Did you know the average child gets their first smartphone at ten years old? A device that has millions of times more computing power than all of Nasa’s combined computing in 1969! Seriously? I felt lucky to have a pet rock at that age. Meanwhile, my friends pined for Mattel’s 9-volt American football handheld game console – all the rage back in 1978.
In many ways, it led the way for today’s apps. Mattel has a lot to answer for! Ah well – sometimes it just helps to hear first-hand the tech challenges faced by OTHER parents.
So, special thanks to guest blogger Tyler Jacobson – husband, father, freelance writer and outreach specialist – for sharing his journey across the smartphone divide! Over to Tyler…
We parents face a unique problem: technology. This is not to say technology was never around when we were kids. But the technology we have today was considered science-fiction only a generation ago, especially smartphone parental controls. We’ve even caught up with Star Trek in some areas!
Surrounded by tech, it not only seems normal to give your tween a smartphone…but even a no-brainer! But is it?
The World at their Fingertips
I had the same dilemma when my daughter – ten at the time – asked me for her first smartphone. I was torn. Admittedly, my smartphone was such an integral part of my everyday life that I almost said yes. But after some thought, I told her to let me have a think.
Smartphones are very different animals compared to the mobile phones of yesteryear. They are ‘smart’ by nature, but this comes at a price in terms of $$$ and privacy. I did some research and came up with a list of the pros and cons of smartphones for tweens. Not only would this help me make informed choices, but I could provide my daughter with clear reason for my decision. Hopefully, it will help you decide if your child is ready for their first smartphone too.
Pros of smartphones for tweens
1) Knowledge is Power
When it comes to a choice between a phone and a smartphone, this is obviously the first factor. Access to the internet is invaluable, with libraries of knowledge at their fingertips. Kids have an uncanny ability to find almost anything on the web (for good and for worse). This can help them with homework, or let them explore their hobbies or interest at their own pace.
2) Ease of Communication
If she’s at school and needs something, want’s a ride home, or if she’s in trouble, it’s still a cell phone. I want her to be able to contact me if and when she needs me. And I want her to stay in contact with her friends and family members too. What’s more, mapping, timetable and calendar apps are all useful utilities which serve a purpose, both now and as she grows older.
3) Social Connections
I know it’s hip to blame social media for our kids losing their sense of connectivity with real life, but let’s face a fact: It’s easier to stay connected with friends and family online. Don’t get me wrong, a call or visit is still important. But these days my kids can effortlessly maintain relations with their cousins in a different timezone. This makes them feel more connected and gives them a greater sense of family. There’s just no replacing that.
RELATED: Losing your child to screens?
Cons of smartphones for tweens
1) Access to Information
Remember that internet thing? This includes unfiltered information about sex, violence, drugs, racism, and any number of things I’m not ready for her to discover yet. Kids don’t want or need to see these things, nor is she old enough to make sense of what she is viewing. You can find more information about the dangers here.
2) Unregulated Communication
Smartphones offer many ways to communicate other than just call or text. There are emails, picture messaging, videos. And then there’s social media (see below). With her phone, she could contact anyone without the chance for me to meet them first! In fact, she could communicate with anyone without having even met them first! I’d have no clue who she’s interacting with, leaving it entirely to her judgement.
[Kids as young as seven are being investigated for sexting in schools]
3) Social Media
With many ways to interact, and socialise online, peer pressure and cyberbullying are a very real threat. And for parents, it can be a real challenge to moderate these things. Social media has become a substitute for face-to-face interactions for tweens and teens. And many kids create an ‘online persona’ which is very different from who they truly are.
[NSPCC records 88% rise in kids seeking help for online abuse]
4) Excessive Screen Time
The main issue is the increased amount of screen time. My daughter is spending countless hours in front of screens, with computer monitors at schools, tv’s and using the family tablet at home. And any free time can easily be taken over by a smartphone. Today our kids are used to constant overstimulation, and this can lead to other issues – attention issues, sleep problems, nearsightedness – that we are just beginning to comprehend.
[Kid’s sleeplessness may be linked to bedtime use of electronic gadgets]
Is your tween ready for a smartphone?
On balance, I decided my daughter simply wasn’t ready for her first smartphone yet. And with a wealth of resources on the internet, I had plenty of evidence to back up my decision.
Technology is a great thing, no doubt about that.But it is up to us parents to decide when our kids are ready for the responsibility that a smartphone brings. With a little thought, we can guide our kids wisely through the digital age – without losing the fun.
At Habyts, we’d love to hear how other parents and families are managing the ups and downs of digital parenting. If you have any tips, tricks or insights, please share your perspective!