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10 tips for securing your child’s phone

As parents, we strive to limit screen time. There are many discussions surrounding when it’s right to give a child a phone. However, there are just as many reasons why we choose to give our children phones of their own.

Sometimes, it’s a matter or convenience. Other times, it’s a necessary evil. Children of split households benefit from the ability to contact their other parent at any time. Families who are busy with sports or other activities can synchronize calendars and keep abreast of schedule changes. Kids who feel sick or bullied while at school have an immediate connection back to their parents…

Regardless of your reasoning behind giving your child a phone, certain precautions ensure that her phone use isn’t breeding bad habits or exposing her to issues beyond her emotional maturity. For the benefit of others who have found it necessary to give their children phones, here are my ten tips for securing a child’s phone.

  1. Choose the right phone for your child

Not all phones are created equal, and not every child needs a smart phone.  If your child simply needs the ability to reach you during the day, a phone with limited capabilities might be more appropriate – and less expensive – than an Internet-capable device. However, if you child relies on the Internet for school assignments, schedules and calendars, homework, or research, then a smart phone could be your solution.

An alternative to a smart phone could be a limited-capability phone supplemented with a tablet for Internet access. Tablets can be further restricted by requiring WiFi in order to control when your child accesses the Internet.

If you do choose a smart phone, make sure it can be monitored, that it has sensible parental controls, and that it can be GPS located.

  1. Spend the extra money for both insurance and GPS location

I admit it – we balked at the extra cost per month for the geo-location app for our daughter’s iPhone. We did, however, pay for insurance.

Then it got stolen, and we paid the price for declining that location service. It would have been nice to track the phone and report the theft. At least we were able to get a replacement without issue. And by issue, I mean spending a whole lot of extra money.

When we received our daughter’s replacement phone, we installed the GPS application and signed up for the monitoring service. With our carrier, I can go online and pull up a map that shows me exactly where her phone is. It doesn’t help her find it when it gets lost in the house, but it could be useful if she gets separated from us in a crowd. We are also fully prepared in case it ever gets stolen again.

  1. Use the phone’s parental controls

Phone manufacturers and carriers alike have come to terms with the fact that many of their phones are carried by children. Both phones and carrier services have built-in capabilities to secure personal data, limit Internet sharing, and provide detailed usage reports. Learn the capabilities of your child’s phone, and use them to your advantage!

Regardless of the depth of parental controls you choose to use, when you get your child’s phone, take these immediate steps before handing the device to your child:

  • Shut off public alerts. Your child really doesn’t need up-to-date and unfiltered information about kidnappings, storm warnings, and global terror alerts.
  • Disable the location service attached to the phone’s camera. Pictures taken with the location service installed pinpoint your child’s location to within a few meters.
  • Disable auto-upload to the cloud for photos and videos. Actively monitor your child’s photos and videos, choose what is stored to cloud services with your child, and set privacy appropriately.
  1. Make a contract and monitor your child’s activities

Like any other device, your child’s phone use should start out as a discussion. In order to form healthy phone-use habits, discuss the “how, when, and why” rules for use.

There are many examples online of cell phone usage contracts for kids. Download one, edit it to your liking, print it out, and use it to start the dialogue between yourself and your children regarding phone usage. Keep it handy so that you can refer back to it in case your child breaks the rules.

Additionally, monitor your child’s phone activities. A simple way to keep track of your child’s pictures, text messages, and search history is to sync the phone with your personal computer. Plug the phone into your computer once per week and allow it to synchronize. Go through your child’s phone use activities with her, refer back to your contract, and keep the discussion open as to what is acceptable and appropriate.

  1. Understand the regulations

Just because a website integration is available on the phone  doesn’t mean it’s meant for kids. Social media isn’t required for connection; don’t give in to the “everyone is doing it” mentality.

All US-based Internet sites must adhere to the COPPA regulations. The NSPCC defines regulations and recommendations for children and Internet usage in the UK. Social networking sites such as Facebook, Twitter and YouTube state within their usage guidelines that children must be at least 13 years old to have their own account.

Take these regulations and recommendations into serious consideration, and use them as decision-making criteria when it comes to integrating your child’s phone with the Internet. Go back to your original question: Why does my child have this phone? If your preteen or teen has a smart phone for the ability to research, then only enable accounts on sites recommended by the school. If your child needs the ability to contact certain friends or family members, provide her with those phone numbers.

  1. Secure screen access on your child’s phone

All phones have auto-locking screens with the option to use codes, patterns, or biometrics to unlock the device for use.

I’m a big fan of the iPhone’s new thumbprint locking system. If the phone is biometrically locked to your child, then only she can access the screen. It can’t be hijacked by one of her friends when they want to play a prank. It’s also useless to anyone who tries to steal the device.

The biometric system has an override mechanism, allowing for a 4-to-7-digit passcode. You have the option to share that code with your child or not. If you choose to share the override passcode with your child, then reiterate the importance of keeping all password secure, even from friends.

  1. Limit phone time just like any other screen

Your child doesn’t need to check her email during dinner or play games while waiting for the bus. Let her know that the phone is a privilege, just like the Xbox and Netflix. It’s not a go-to device to combat boredom.

Use the phone’s parental controls to programmatically lock the phone’s Internet capabilities during certain hours (i.e., overnight, during school, etc.) Let your child know that the phone’s talk and text features are always available in case of emergencies. Teach her the proper time and place for accessing the phone’s extended capabilities.

  1. Lock down purchase ability

Have you heard the one about the toddler who spent $2500 of his parents’ money playing that “free” game? Hopefully that wasn’t your kid. I’m thankful it wasn’t mine!

Most phones want a credit card entered in as part of the setup process. Fortunately, they also make it really easy to say, “Never use this without a password.” In the iStore, you can also lock down free downloads.

It’s obvious why you’d secure your credit card—but free apps? Why lock those? Simple: It requires a dialogue between you and your child for each application they attempt to install. You can read the description, reviews, ratings, and warnings prior to allowing your child access to the app.

  1. Limit overnight access to the phone

There are many reasons to banish cell phones from the bedroom. Sure, they make excellent alarm clocks. But so do alarm clocks. Going back to my initial example, had my daughter’s phone been safely plugged in downstairs, her sleep wouldn’t have been disturbed by the buzz of the Amber alert. She wouldn’t have been groggy and grumpy getting ready for school.

There’s no good reason for a child to have a phone in her room at night. Sleep hours are precious for kids; they need that solid, undisturbed sleep with as few distractions as possible. Set up a secure location in the house where all the household phones get charged. Make it a nightly ritual where everyone plugs in their devices and leaves them for the evening. Make it early—before bed time—and substitute something interactive before bed that leaves your child feeling connected to the family, rather than tied to the Internet.

  1. Set a good example

If your phone contract states that your child can’t use her phone at the dinner table, then make sure yours is tucked away as well. Learn to enjoy waiting for the bus by counting cars or talking about something interesting with your child. Show your child that the world outside her phone is just as interesting – if not more – than what is going on in digital space.

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